Rebuilding the Site, Rebuilding Myself

Over the past few weeks I’ve been rebuilding schappet.com, the site you’re reading now. The goal has been function over polish — something readable, stable, and alive.

In parallel, I’ve been shaping the agreements that will guide my online circling community through conflict. Both projects pull me from theory into form: a working admin for the blog, a shared code for relationship.

As code, content, and clarity begin to move together, I feel more anchored in myself.

Holding Activation

Lately I’ve been exploring what happens when activation meets relationship.

How can a container like circling hold need, conflict, and intensity without hierarchy or control? How can people find shared ground while staying sovereign?

Beneath this lies a subtler question — how to meet the moment when pain arises between self and other: I’m hurting, but you’re not my enemy, and what you said still matters.

My work now is to slow those moments down until connection, acceptance, and dignity can re-emerge.

Parallels in Code

Alongside the relational work, I’ve been exploring automation, development, and content systems. The technical side satisfies a different part of my mind — structured, precise, quietly absorbing.

I keep seeing the parallel: debugging code and navigating human dynamics draw on the same attention — seeing where flow is blocked, restoring coherence, listening to the system itself.

Language as Mirror

The deeper I go into community work, the more I see the same pattern repeat. Whenever people gather, conflicting needs surface.

One person needs space, another needs contact; one’s activation repels, another’s transforms the room.

The fracture reveals itself first in language — the shift from describing to judging. The moment I hear it, I feel my own judgment rise in response.

What Comes Next

Going forward, I’ll be writing about what sits at the intersection of these worlds — authentic relating, community dynamics, and the technical tools that support them.

Reflections on relationship, attention, and design — filtered through both code and conversation.